May 2013
2 tags
white dad in any movie: but son, you're throwing away your DREAM
white son in any movie: no dad, I'm throwing away ~yours~
me at school: omg when i get home i've got to do loads of shit like finish that project and read that book omg i need to review for that test too omg so much to do
me at home:
skittlesndrpepper:
craigmothertucker:
so my 16 year old brother made himself a balloon son and kept a photo album of their day together here it is
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my boyfriend and his outstanding level of maturity.
breathing in morse code
writingsforwinter:
Today I memorize your heartbeat line by line.
You once got a tattoo of the spikes of breath that show up
on a breathing machine in the hospital, on your forearm
above the tiny red birthmark that looked like the blood
of a grapefruit shot with a handgun. I once read
about an elderly man who used to call up complete strangers
every day before his death, and talked about...
knifefarty:
if i had the power to control time i would probably just use it to sleep more
the greeks believed in apricots as the cure for...
writingsforwinter:
If I can’t have the boy, at least I can have his clothes.
They leave their sweaters, their jackets, their blue jeans draped
over my bed like petals, filling the bathtub, rising to the surface
of the water like buoys. Always men have told me
that I don’t look eighteen-a few years older, especially
if I have a cigarette in hand; my therapist once pontificated
that loving...
gothlolita:
reason s to date me
i have at least ten money saved up in the bank, can buy chicken nugget
i am very popular in nintendogs
i have a dog and its okay if you ignore me just to play wit h the dog because i will probably do that too
macaroni and cheese
i
first of all, who let me get so emotionally invested in a television show
You make it look so easy.
I sit before flowers
hoping they will train me in the art
of opening up
– Shane Koyczan (via andcombust)
friendsofthegaybc:
travisstolls:
friendsofthegaybc:
travisstolls:
WHEN HE WAS A YOUNG WARTHOG
WHEN I WAS A YOUNG WARTHOOOOOOOOG
Very nice
Thanks
shedisenchants:
shedisenchants:
so every year after the juniors finish reading The Great Gatsby my high school english teacher throws a Gatsby party at his huge house and everyone shows up in period clothing and Charlestons to 20s music and my english teacher just wears a suit and stands off to the side staring wistfully out the window the entire night
you guys think I’m joking??
leftforbed:
leftforbed:
mcsnuggie:
true self control is waiting until the movie starts to eat your popcorn
why would the movie eat my popcorn
nevermind i get it
alltimeangela:
why does leonardo dicaprio always end up dead in the water with no girlfriend
emilioestevez:
story time
so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.
awkwardvagina:
one time my friend asked me to make a playlist for a road trip because their car radio didnt work so i made one that consisted of 14 different versions of party in the usa and long story short im not trusted with bringing music anymore
1 tag
I thought leaving you would be easy,
just walking out the door
but I keep...
– (via clementinevonradics)
selfdoubtandsyphilis:
dankestrnemes:
do animals think in english or in the sounds they make
this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for
God I want you
in some primal, wild way
animals want each other.
Untamed and...
– Want, Clementine von Radics (via godbless-themess)
I could start fires with what I feel for you.
– Fires, David Ramirez (via ijustd0i)
toadlyoko:
So in middle school we weren’t allowed to have any drinks aside from water but I kept sprite or the clear kool aid in a water bottle and felt like I was someone who made moonshine during the prohibition era.
unabused:
i wonder if chinese tourists get upset when they buy a souvenir in america then find out it was made in china
5 tags